Forgiveness is never an easy topic; nor is it an easy task.
Before I go any further I want us to know that forgiveness and trust are not synonymous. We can forgive someone, but not place ourselves in a position to be hurt by them again. The two are not equal. Imagine being bitten by a wild dog and you respond, “Oh, I forgive you Mr. Wild dog.” but then you try to pet it again. The result will be the same, because that wild dogs nature has not changed…it is still wild and it will bite you again. To intentionally put yourself into the presence of someone who has hurt you, the result will be the same, they will hurt you again.
Continuing on, I have found myself many times in the place of needing to forgive someone but it is like pulling the proverbial “eye-teeth” for me to do it.
Why? Why is it so difficult? Why can’t we as humans just do it and move on? Well, I never really understood how to answer that for anyone or myself.
I acknowledge what God says about it in Matthew 6:14-15 where Jesus says, “For if ye forgive men their trespasses (sins against you), your heavenly Father will also forgive you; But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses (sins against God and man).” And, I fully believe this.
I suppose that was the reason why I always did, but it was always begrudgingly. It wasn’t until a few years ago that I was shown some Truth. Forgiveness is not about the offender; it is about something that coexists with God’s forgiveness of us.
I am a school Administrator for our church’s Christian school. I hold daily staff devotion and prayer time 15 minutes before students begin to arrive. In our devotional book this year, authored by Max Lucado, the topic was on forgiveness. This is what he wrote.
“How much justice is enough? Picture your enemy for a moment. Picture him tied to the whipping post. The strong-armed man with the whip turns to you and asks, “how many lashes?” And you give him a number. The whip cracks and the blood flows. And the punishment is inflicted. Your foe slumps to the ground and you walk away.
Are you happy now? Do you feel better? Are you at peace?
Perhaps for a while, but soon another memory will surface, and another lash will be needed, and…when does it all stop? It stops when you take seriously the words of Jesus. In Matthew 6:14-15.
“Treat me as I treat my neighbor.” Are you aware that this is what you are saying to your father? “Give me what I give them. Grant me the same piece I grant others. Let me enjoy the same tolerance I offer.”
God will treat you the way you treat others. Would you like some peace? Then quit giving your neighbor such a hassle. You want to enjoy God’s generosity? Then let others enjoy yours. Would you like to have the assurance that God Forgives you? I think you know what you need to do.”
You might be thinking, “So How does forgiveness benefit me? What is that greater thing?”
Well, as already stated, forgiveness opens up the door for God to forgive us. That is exciting enough, honestly! Yet, you can forgive, like I did, but begrudgingly.
So the other part of forgiveness is this; the act of forgiveness releases a person (you the forgiver) from the emotional and psychological burdens of anger, resentment, and bitterness.
There it is. Forgiveness, specifically God’s way, brings about freedom! Freedom to move on and Freedom from bearing the guilt of your own sin. This opens the door for you to be forgiven too!
Release yourself from the unnecessary burden, and you never know, it might just bring a radical change in the offender.
THE LAMPLIGHTERS PROJECT 